Sunday, January 17, 2021

Gone Away for Good

Just another day of waking up with this achiness in my heart.

He’s gone away from me

He’s gone away for me

He’s got away for good

Now there’s nothing left except this empty space where he used to rest in my bed

He’s gone away for good

Just another day of wondering why I kicked you out of our home

I’ve gone away from you

I’ve gone away for you

I’ve got away for good

Now there’s nothing left where are used to rest  but this emptiness in your bed

I’ve gone away for good

Just another day of longing for a better life ahead

She’s gone away from us

She’s gone away for us

she’s got away for good

Now there’s nothing left except this emptiness in our beds

she’s gone away for good

He’s gone away from me 

I’ve got away from you

she’s gone away from us

We’ve gone away for good

We've done away for good

We’ve got away for good

Written May 10 2020 ©

Crislyn Sand

I wrote this song because in Jan 2020 Annabelle's father and I had gotten to a place in our relationship that I just couldn't be around him anymore because he would drink and get drunk and say things that would upset me. It is difficult with all the stress I already had in my life so I reached a place where I just couldn't take the domestic violence anymore so I kicked him out. A few days later I found out he had gone out on a date with some random girl he met at a local bar and then suddenly was in this new relationship and SO in love.. I felt betrayed at first (even though Annabelles dad and I haven't been in a relationship for along time it still felt like I had been cheated on and it hurt my heart how suddenly he moved on).

But I during that same time had met a new guy and begun my own new dating relationship but with more caution.. So I felt my heart disconnect form Annabelle's father in a way that was healing and healthy. Which is why I chose the lyrics "gone away for good"

The last verse was a combination of my thought of what if Annabelle feels the shift and change in the dynamic of the family - her family mom and dad seperating and decides she doesn't want to be in physical form anymore? I mean I have often wondered with her CHD how many more surgeries she would have to endure to buy more time to live a longer life. I have often believed that Annabelle was an angel a gift given to me by god to help heal my heart and my life.. What if when my heart and my life is finally healed my loan of this angel would be gone? What if Annabelle one day decided she no longer wanted to fight? I would be heart broken over again cause there would be nothing left to hold on to and eventually in time I would have to find a way to carry on.

Thursday, January 7, 2021