Saturday, October 23, 2010

What Dreams Are Made Of..

You became apart of me so quickly it caught me by surprise.
To have someone you've been waiting for walk into your life so unexpectedly.
I try and remember.
What was it about you I found so interesting. so fascinating?
A familiar bookstore.
A shy tall polite man said "Hello".
A pleasant smile.
A girl with a Beatles bag.
Who knew all these things would lead to now.
I was so interested in getting to know you.
Wanting to understand what it was about you that made you tick.
What was it that you wanted most out of life?
He said to pursue my dream, while I am young enough to have the courage in me to try.
He was 33 and a dreamer.
She was 27 and looking for something anything to inspire her again.
Inspire her to dream, to believe in magic.
Tea, conversations of god and the universe.
was this fate? Was this coincidence?
Was this just an accident?

I remembered him as we departed that day.
I remember being excited. Anticipating when we would meet again.
What would it be like?
Would I see you again?
As my mind filled with these doubts I got a text.
A transmission of the universe communicating with me.
You have a beautiful smile.
Here was this man so polite so gentle telling me he enjoyed our evening too.

What happened to me?

He mentioned that he had a show the next wednesday of that week.
So I went. I didn't know what quite to expect so I brought some friends.
I heard him sing.
It surprised me.
Here is this man I can so clearly see, trying to express his soul.
his music.
His views of the world.
He fustrations with life.
Born to bleed.
was he signing about me?
Did he know our paths would meet?

How can this be. i thought to myself.
How can this be.

After he greeted me with egerness. Delighted that I had come to see him.
To hear him. To get to know him.
Spend more time with him.

We laugh.
We walked.
we talked.
Breakfast at 1am.
He walked me back to my car.
He kissed my cheek.
And the smell of him so sweet lingered in the air in my car ride home.
I thought what is that smell?
What is it.
Intosicating.
sandalwood of all things.
Musk. Sweet scent, mixed with lavendar.

I loved him. I hardly knew him. But I loved him.
I wanted more. i needed more.
I was looking for more.
And was this it?
Was he it for me???????
Was this what I have been waiting for?

I saw you once.
I saw who you where.
I saw what dreams you had... and I believed in you.
I had faith in you.
I had faith in the posibilities that lied before us. this. Whatever it was.

time.
we both had left such and impression on eachother.
This yearning was there I had never felt before.
Words echanged.

You have stayed true to your words 2 years past.
You have never left me down.
You have never let me down.
YOU HAVE NEVER LET ME DOWN.

I have.
I stoped believingin the dreams.
I stopped believeing in the dreams.
for if we don't have dreams, we give into our fear.

I see that now.
I see that now.

You never stopped believing.
Show me how to have blind faith.
tell me i am wrong.
loving you was the best thing I will ever do.

inspire me to grow again.

Sunday, October 10, 2010

Stuck in the places we're at.......

I sit all alone with only my thoughts,
watching a blank screen
as I pray that you'll be coming on,
waiting by the phone every night
at the time you normally call
hoping just to hear your voice again tonight.

Life feels so hollow
without you here by my side,
with you is where I belong
and this distance is killing me slowly,
I hate the miles that separate us
but right now we're stuck where we are.

Stuck in the places we're at,
not where we want to be,
in this long distance relationship
with only pictures to hold at night
to feel just a little closer to the one we love,
stroking your cheek through the glass
instead of your skin.

Caught up in the world
and stuck in a nightmare,
not where we had seen ourselves by now,
the nights get so long and cold
and the days seem impossible sometimes,
praying the distance will melt away.

The minutes seem like hours
and the hours seem like days
as slowly the time apart passes,
so slowly it's killing me,
I just can't help but cry
as I think of you baby.

Praying to find the strength to keep fighting
for this love that means more than anything
but the distance hurts so much
as the days keep passing us by,
sometimes it seems like things will never change,
those are the days that hurt the most.

Stuck in the places we're at,
not where we want to be,
in this long distance relationship
with only pictures to hold at night
to feel just a little closer to the one we love,
stroking your cheek through the glass
instead of your skin.

I'll wait for you as long as it takes,
you're worth any and everything to me,
hearing your voice across the distance
is the sweetest sound I've ever heard
but it doesn't relieve the pain
that I still can't touch you.