Sunday, October 30, 2011

Can I go for a W-A-L-K!

Mary & Baby Jesus

My Mask




Don't be fooled by me.
Don't be fooled by the face I wear.
For I wear a mask.
I wear a thousand masks-
masks that I'm afraid to take off
and none of them are me. 
Pretending is an art that's second nature with me 
but don't be fooled, 
for God's sake, don't be fooled. 
I give you the impression that I'm secure
That all is sunny and unruffled with me within as well as without,
that confidence is my name
and coolness my game,
that the water's calm
and I'm in command,
and that I need no one.
But don't believe me. Please!

My surface may be smooth but my surface is my mask,
My ever-varying and ever-concealing mask.
Beneath lies no smugness, no complacence.
Beneath dwells the real me in confusion, in fear, in aloneness.
But I hide this.
I don't want anybody to know it.
I panic at the thought of my
weaknesses
and fear exposing them.
That's why I frantically create my masks 
to hide behind. 
They're nonchalant, sophisticated facades 
to help me pretend,
To shield me from the glance that
knows.
But such a glance is precisely my salvation,
my only salvation,
and I know it.

That is, if it's followed by acceptance,
and if it's followed by love.
It's the only thing that can liberate me from myself
from my own self-built prison walls

I dislike hiding, honestly
I dislike the superficial game I'm playing, 
the superficial phony game.
I'd really like to be genuine and me.
But I need your help, your hand to hold
Even though my masks would tell you otherwise
That glance from you is the only thing that assures me
of what I can't assure myself,
that I'm really worth something.

But I don't tell you this.
I don't dare.
I'm afraid to.
I'm afraid you'll think less of me, that you'll laugh
and your laugh would kill me.
I'm afraid that deep-down I'm nothing, 
that I'm just no good
and you will see this and reject me.

So I play my game, my desperate, pretending game
With a facade of assurance without,
And a trembling child within.
So begins the parade of masks,

The glittering but empty parade of masks,
and my life becomes a front.
I idly chatter to you in suave tones of surface talk.
I tell you everything that's nothing
and nothing of what's everything, 
of what's crying within me.
So when I'm going through my routine
do not be fooled by what I'm saying
Please listen carefully and try to hear
what I'm not saying
Hear what I'd like to say
but what I can not say.

It will not be easy for you,
long felt inadequacies make my defenses strong.
The nearer you approach me
the blinder I may strike back.
Despite what books say of women, I am irrational;
I fight against the very thing that I cry out for.
You wonder who I am
you shouldn't
for I am everyman
and everywoman
who wears a mask.
Don't be fooled by me.
At least not by the face I wear.





Ten Times A Day Sounds About Right Paulie

Friday, October 28, 2011

My happy place

Taco Meat Yum

Du-Par's Pie

Pie

3's a Crowd?

David & Me

Rypie the Multi-Tasker

Seasons of Carnal Desire

Unexpected love, carnal desire.
What did I do to turn your thoughts my way?
Why did the fates for our hearts conspire?

You gazed at me and saw me entire,
And found instead amidst hearts run astray
Unexpected Love, carnal desire.

A new love for us then did transpire
Molded into stars from unhappy clay
Why did the fates for our hearts conspire?

Purged hope of love from my heart entire
Though what found me out was that summer day
Unexpected Love, carnal desire.

You lit the match that set my soul on fire,
My autumn love did kindle into may,
Why did the fates for our hearts conspire?

The winter of my life calls me liar
I confess these things of you when I pray:
Unexpected Love, carnal desire.
Why did the fates for our hearts conspire?

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"I choose to make the rest of my life the best of my life" - Louise L. Hay

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

The Foundry's Candle

New friends yay!

Skye & Me

Event Reminder

Crislyn's Halloween Show & Fundrasing

Hosted by Crislyn Sand

Crislyn Sand wanted to remind you that Crislyn's Halloween Show & Fundrasing is coming up on 10/27/2011 at 6:30 PM.

Your current reply: Not yet replied

Saturday, October 22, 2011

Open my...

Open my heart,
seeing that you already have the key,
Open my heart to meet with the pleasure of your life,
Open my heart,
So far you will find your heart desire,
Open my heart to come accross your life wonders,
Open my heart,
To determine that it was for good,
Open my heart,
To get to know utterly its aspiration,
Open my heart,
In order to find what I devoted for you,
Open my heart,
That's the only way to verify the truth,
Open my heart,
To find no difficulty to trust me,
Open my heart,
This where resides the true love,
Open my heart,
I'm so exhausted to give evidence of love,
Open my heart,
I can't resist no more, even for a second,
Open my heart.
...and that would be a passionate triumph!



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"I choose to make the rest of my life the best of my life" - Louise L. Hay


Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Friends

A friend is someone who listens,
A friend is someone who cares.
A friend is someone who understands,
A friend is someone who shares.
It's nice to have a special friend
To tell all your secrets to.
It's nice to know that someone you like,
Is someone who really likes you.
A friend is someone you call on the phone
To talk about nothing at all.
A friend is someone who cheers you up.
And makes you feel ten feet tall.
Everyone would like to have
A special friend it's true
But if you want a special friend,
You need to be one, too.


Follow my blog: www.crislynsandisat.blogspot.com


"I choose to make the rest of my life the best of my life" - Louise L. Hay

An Artist

Green Chile Tamales.. Yummy.

Ocean View

Anchor Blue??!!